Shortly after the discovery of TRAPPIST-1, a system of seven planets in the constellation Aquarius of which some might potentially be habitable, a senior NASA official invited President Trump to participate in a manned mission to the distant star.

“From real estate tycoon to TV star to President of the United States: what could be next for the man who really has done it all?” White House sources report the official as saying to Trump. “How about becoming the first man ever to venture outside the solar system? Wouldn’t that be ultra-cool?”

“We’re designing a spacecraft especially for you,” the official added. “We call it ‘Space Force One’. Really luxurious. You’ll love it. Over a thousand video-on-demand selections, and we’ve found a way to cook the perfect filet mignon in zero gravity.”

Asked how long the voyage would take, the official replied: “It’s only thirty-nine light years. At maximum warp, you could be out and back in the time it takes to pop down to Mar-a-Lago.”

The President is reportedly considering the offer, and educating himself on interstellar travel by watching Star Trek. The NASA official, when an interviewer pointed out that a one-way trip to TRAPPIST-1 on the fastest spacecraft now in existence would actually take 685,000 years, replied after a moment’s hesitation: “You know that, and I know that, but he doesn’t need to know that.”


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